98/12 Living Amends

Today I have 98 days sober and 12 days abstinent.  I went to a meeting this morning, and it was such a powerful meeting.  When I really listen, no matter what my frame of mind is, I get so much from any meeting that I go to.  I can identify with any speaker.  One of the speakers this morning happened to be a good friend of mine, and it was so nice to hear her story .
I met with my mother yesterday.  I haven’t seen her in ages.  It was really weird, actually, but really nice to see her.  It makes me really sad to think about how much grief I’ve brought about into her life.  And since I’m not on Step 9 yet, making a living amends by staying sober and showing up is all I can do, rather than to look back in regret and continue the same behaviors.
Relationships are hard.  Especially relationships with family, I think.  But this is the beginning of new beginnings and better relationships in my life.