Caretaking: Common Among Those With Anorexia

A common personality trait that is seen in those who suffer from Anorexia is a need/desire to caretake others. This is often seen as the person being people pleasing, and doing anything possible to avoid conflict between those around them. Most often their own needs are put behind the needs of others, many times in an effort to be accepted or approved of. In the realm of the Drama Triangle, you can see how this relates to the role of Rescuer. Is this always bad? The answer comes when you examine the entire picture, and can see if the one who is taking the role of caretaker, is doing so in absence of taking care of their own needs, or if you can see that it is actually enabling the one being taken care of, or allowing that person to not have to face responsility for their own lives.
In recovery, I have learned to discern my desires to caretake, while also realizing that it can be a valuable trait, when done with sincerity, and without sacrificing my own needs in the process. My own need for validation has been reduced because I have learned to value my own worth without grading it on my accomplishments, or whether other people always accept me.

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